Is my mom over-reacting(need advice from parents of teens)?

ok so like 6 days ago i had my boyfriend over to have sex and after ten minutes my mom came home and caught us(i thought she wasnt gonna be home till later). but to make a long story short,





* im 17 and so is he


*im christian


*my mom is christian





I told my mom i was gonna wait till marriage but i didnt feel like waiting anymore and i didnt feel comfortable telling her i was ready. so far my mom has:





*switched my room with my sisters


*yelled at my boyfriends parents


*making me go get tested for std's and such


*trying to get doctors to give me an IUD so i wont get pregnant for 5 years.


*told me my boyfriend wasnt aloud over anymore


*trying ot make me write a report on the costs of apartments, doctor appointments, birthcontrol, etc.





Is she over reacting??? I think she is but i want more viewpoints from people.Is my mom over-reacting(need advice from parents of teens)?
At your age your life is your own choice. Your statement about being a Christian is the problem; that religion has made any form of sexual feelings such a huge taboo that it can't be worked around by any reasonable person.





I would get the IUD for safety in the future but your mom needs to realize that you are your own person and legally in less then 1 year a full adult. What more does she want before letting you make some of your own life choices?Is my mom over-reacting(need advice from parents of teens)?
Yes she is overeacting, but most mums do this! SHe is just worried and scared because you are growing up, she loves you and is worried about all the things that could have gone wrong she is only looking out for you.


Wait until she calms down (wait a month maybe) and then readdress the subject and try to calmy explain to her your situation, after she has had time to calm down she will probably be more understanding about the whole thing. Give it time
maybe the IUD, switching rooms, and writing a report is over kill. She should talk to his parents, but TALK not yell. Its not their fault. And i think your boyfriend being forbidden is stupid cus if ur gunna have sex u can do it MANY other places. She should talk to you about the consequences of sex but not yell. Talk to her. But it is her house and she does have a right to set rules.
well she is being harsh but I think she is absolutely right and being smart about the making you write a report thing. just because you're 17 doesn't make you an adult and you still have to do what she says and she buys you everything you own and legally she is your boss.
I think she is in some cases. Like yelling at his parents.


And in the way of the IUD that is completely inexcusable! That means until you're 22 and 4 years after you're an adult, meaning it's only your choice! If it were my mom I would ***** slap her until she cried.
Nope, she's not overreacting at all.


You shouldn't have been having sex in HER house to begin with. How disrespectful can you get. You deserved to get caught :]





She's doing what she sees fit,


and a lot of parents would have done much worse.


So get over it, you have it easy.
i think that she is being a little strict but it would of been better if you would of told her you were ready for sex because she would of only helped protect you from stds and such but it is hard for a mom to know that her baby is growing up
Completely agree with your mother, get a grip. You need to realize how hard life is before you go on and mess it up just because ';you didn't feel like waiting';


Teenagers these days. jeez.
I think it's absolutely appropriate. I hope you really take into consideration what she's trying to teach you because reality is a lot stronger than your hormones right now.
I think she is.


But hey, what do I know about christians and the way they run their lives?
how old are you?
no, she's not. those are all good ideas, especially the one about her getting you tested for sexually transmitted infections and getting you an IUD. do you really want to get pregnant sometime between being 17 and 22? i didn't think so.





i'm sorry you didn't feel comfortable telling her that you were ready to be sexually active. it's okay that you changed your mind, because ultimately it's your decision. but, if you're going to be sexually active, you have to be protected, so the steps that she's taking to protect you are good. i don't understand the switching your room with your sisters, but really, she's doing this to help you and for your benefit. using contraception and getting tested for sexually transmitted isn't overreacting, at all.
Yes. She should be glad you aren't like a lot of other teens I know who would have sex with a stranger for a fun one night stand. You waited until you were 17 and you waited for the right guy I'm guessing since he is your boyfriend. Your nearly an adult. She's over reacting.Teens have sex. That's just how it is. Although doing it in her house wasn't too smart,but still. The reality is that even if she does all that chances are you will still have sex.
I honestly don't think she is. An IUD is something that's really effective in preventing pregnancy. I don't think she should allow you to have sex with your boyfriend in her house so having him not come over anymore is not that bad. She wants you to be aware of how much things if you do make a mistake, like getting pregnant. You also have to remember she's mad and disappointed right now. She only wants the best for you and having sex can sometimes lead to very bad situations. I don't see what being christian has to do with anything? Are you planning to marry this boyfriend? Is that what that comment was about? No christian man will want to buy the cow when they are handing out the milk for free. Sorry I side with your mom. I'd be just as pissed if it was my child.
I think she is over-reacting a little but she's just being a protective mother and wanting to make sure you know the consequences of having sex.





*switched my room with my sisters - Don't really see what this is going to do unless it's a smaller room.


*yelled at my boyfriends parents - Not really their fault but she wants to make sure they are aware of the situation and talk to their son about it.


*making me go get tested for std's and such - She isn't going to know if you used protection and wants to amke sure you are okay and haven't caught anything. Sensible action.


*trying to get doctors to give me an IUD so i wont get pregnant for 5 years. - Again a very sensible action here. Once you have had sex the first tme, she knows you are going to have sex again. This way you won't fall pregnant untill you are older and in a position to care for the child.


*told me my boyfriend wasnt aloud over anymore - She doesn;t want you to have sex in the house and by saying your fella cant come over, you can't have sex in her house.


*trying ot make me write a report on the costs of apartments, doctor appointments, birthcontrol, etc. - Making sure you are aware of the the costs and the responsibilities,





All in all, she may be over-reacting a little but she's just being a good Mum and making sure you are aware of everything.





Sorry, I know this probably isn't something you wanted to hear, but remember one small thing, three year ago, I was a teenager and was your age five year ago.
I am so thankful my parents never caught me.


I think shes slightly over-reacting. I dont understand the point in switching your rooms?


Also, its not right of her to yell at your boyfriends parents. If she didnt know you guys were having sex, what makes her think your boyfriends parents did know? and that they were okay with it?


Its a good idea to get tested for things, so thats not so bad.


Even if she convinces them to give you an IUD, if you say no, they cant do it. and if you let them, you can have it taken out whenever you want. you dont have to have it for 5 years. But it might not be so bad, then you dont have to worry about getting pregnant.


She just wants you tot understand the responsibilities you are taking on by having sex.
i would understand why she is acting like that, she loves you and she only wants the best for you. another thing is that you told her you were gonna wait till marriage and maybe it would of meant a lot to her. she might also want to prevent pregnancy, even though you do use contraceptives you are still at risk of getting pregnant. she is just being overprotective with you but let her calm down and then talk to her and let her know how you feel about him and the fact that your already having sex. She will understand and in the end if you do get pregnant the one that is gonna be screwed is you. Just use protection..